Editor乌鸦传媒檚 note: The names of the family members in this article have been changed for privacy reasons.

***

Thirty-five-year-old John is on the road to recovery. He乌鸦传媒檚 been sober for seven months now, has changed careers and is focusing on his health.

It wasn乌鸦传媒檛 always like that though. There was a time when all he could focus on was getting high. Then came the night he almost died in November of 2020.

John was living with his parents at the time 乌鸦传媒� a time his mom, Kate, describes as 乌鸦传媒渃haotic.乌鸦传媒�

乌鸦传媒淗e had nowhere to live and we just thought, 乌鸦传媒榃e乌鸦传媒檝e got to do something,乌鸦传媒� but we were thrown into this with little or no knowledge on drugs and what to do with someone who is addicted, but we just knew if we could give him somewhere safe.乌鸦传媒�

On that fateful November night, Kate and her husband overheard very strange breathing sounds coming from John乌鸦传媒檚 room. They checked on John and tried to wake him up, to no avail.

They called 911 and stayed on the line while they waited for paramedics to arrive while their son was turning blue.

乌鸦传媒淭he lady from 911 was awesome,乌鸦传媒� said Kate. 乌鸦传媒淪he stayed on the line and did what she could to help, but we thought we were losing him.乌鸦传媒�

Once paramedics arrived and took over, they pointed out the paraphernalia consistent with opioid use, and began the naloxone process.

乌鸦传媒淭hey gave him five doses,乌鸦传媒� said Kate. 乌鸦传媒淭hey said at the time that was the most they had ever given anyone who hasn乌鸦传媒檛 died. The fifth dose brought him back. He woke up like nothing had happened.乌鸦传媒�

John said it started as a typical night for him.

乌鸦传媒淚 don乌鸦传媒檛 remember too much, but it was a paycheque weekend, so I was partying by myself 乌鸦传媒� that乌鸦传媒檚 how I liked to do it; I didn乌鸦传媒檛 like being around others,乌鸦传媒� he said. 乌鸦传媒淚 would mix cocaine with the heroin/fentanyl乌鸦传媒�. Usually, you just go to sleep, and you wake up a couple of hours later and you乌鸦传媒檙e fine. But this night I wasn乌鸦传媒檛.乌鸦传媒�

John knows that the paramedics saved his life.

乌鸦传媒淚 do remember the paramedic, the one guy especially. I just remember, he just wouldn乌鸦传媒檛 give up on me, and I am so thankful. He was a younger guy 乌鸦传媒� probably younger than me 乌鸦传媒� but he had a big heart, and if it wasn乌鸦传媒檛 for him, I would have lost my life.乌鸦传媒�

乌鸦传媒淭he paramedics were so professional,乌鸦传媒� added Kate. 乌鸦传媒淭hey made no judgment, they just did their job and helped him.乌鸦传媒�

Paramedics urged John to go to the hospital, which he did. A couple of hours after being admitted, he had a heart attack.

乌鸦传媒淭hat (the five doses) was the reason they thought he should go in (to the hospital) because they had never given that much to anyone before and they were worried about his health,乌鸦传媒� said Kate.

John signed himself out of the hospital the next day, against the doctors乌鸦传媒� wishes.

乌鸦传媒淏ut not before they gave him their two cents乌鸦传媒� worth on how much risk he had put himself under by doing the drugs,乌鸦传媒� said Kate. 乌鸦传媒淗e was doing fentanyl and carfentanil by that time. I think it scared him because he stayed away from it after that.乌鸦传媒�

John said although he had naloxone injections before, this one rattled him.

乌鸦传媒淚 can count maybe 10 times I had to be 乌鸦传媒楴arcaned乌鸦传媒� and resuscitated back, but the one in November 2020 was the biggest, scariest one, especially because I was with my parents, my mom, under her roof when it happened,乌鸦传媒� he said. 乌鸦传媒淭here were others, but I believe that one, my heart stopped. 乌鸦传媒�

Familiar path to dependency

John乌鸦传媒檚 spiral into opioid dependency is a familiar tale.

He was in a bad car accident many years ago, and the drugs he was given for pain relief became a necessary part of his life.

乌鸦传媒淗e was critically injured and in hospital with pretty much every bone broken below his head,乌鸦传媒� said Kate. 乌鸦传媒淪o they started him on all kinds of medication then. He was in the hospital for about three months and then in a wheelchair for another six months after that. With the whole privacy thing I was not privy to all the drugs he was on, but I did notice (changes). I couldn乌鸦传媒檛 tell if it was because of how much pain he was in, or if it was the drugs talking, but his personality - that friendly, happy kid that I knew - that was gone. The pain, and the drugs, had taken over.乌鸦传媒�

乌鸦传媒淭hat乌鸦传媒檚 when I had painkillers for the first time and I kind of liked the feeling, but I didn乌鸦传媒檛 start (with the heavier drugs) until a little after that,乌鸦传媒� said John. 乌鸦传媒淚 was offered OxyContin and after a while, it just went into a full-blown heroin addiction, fentanyl addiction.乌鸦传媒�

He said that for the first while, he was able to limit his use to weekends.

乌鸦传媒淚 was trying to use and still have a normal lifestyle, going to work and things like that,乌鸦传媒� said John. 乌鸦传媒淏ut then it got to the point that I was using at work, too.乌鸦传媒�

John would use for a few days, go through a self-detox, then go back to the drugs.

乌鸦传媒淚t was always a cycle of going back to it, then detoxing乌鸦传媒� the detoxing was terrible. Everything that you go through by detoxing is awful. But then after a week passed, for me, personally, I would forget about the harshness of the detox and convince myself to go back to the drugs 乌鸦传媒� After a short span of that actually working, it wasn乌鸦传媒檛 like that anymore.乌鸦传媒�

Eventually, the high took over John乌鸦传媒檚 life.

乌鸦传媒淚 ended up being homeless, and that was the only thing that mattered, was the drug.乌鸦传媒�

Recovering

John had a relapse shortly after release from the hospital, then checked into a rehab program. He has been sober now for seven months.

乌鸦传媒淭he challenges are always there,乌鸦传媒� said John. 乌鸦传媒淭here are times when I think throw caution to the wind and get back into it, what does it really matter? So I have to snap myself out of it and think about now 乌鸦传媒� being sober at that moment; go to sleep sober. It乌鸦传媒檚 not been easy, but I have to accept that I have made that decision that I can乌鸦传媒檛 ever do it again, for any reason. It乌鸦传媒檚 such a slippery, dangerous slope. I know I can乌鸦传媒檛 just do it once, or I will be right back at it.乌鸦传媒�

乌鸦传媒淗e knows what his triggers are, and he乌鸦传媒檚 staying away from all that,乌鸦传媒� said Kate. 乌鸦传媒淗e was in construction, which was a big trigger. So he got out of that and is doing something totally different now.乌鸦传媒�

John said the support he has received from his family keeps him going in the tough times.

乌鸦传媒淭hey make me so proud. They haven乌鸦传媒檛 given up on me, so I am not going to give up on myself.乌鸦传媒�

The emotion he feels for his family now is something that was not there when he was in the grips of dependency. But John looks back on that night in November, 2020 as a turning point in his life.

乌鸦传媒淭hat night especially kind of hits me,乌鸦传媒� he said. 乌鸦传媒淲hen I bring it up, I shed a tear, just knowing how my mom must have felt, seeing them use Narcan after Narcan kit and I乌鸦传媒檓 laying there, dead, in front of her. That乌鸦传媒檚 something I don乌鸦传媒檛 want my mom, or anyone that is close to me to ever go through again.乌鸦传媒�

As for Kate, she said Nar-Anon has been a godsend to her.

乌鸦传媒淭hat is what helped me survive,乌鸦传媒� she said. 乌鸦传媒淚 still go to meetings. You don乌鸦传媒檛 have anyone else you can talk to about this. Your normal friends don乌鸦传媒檛 want to hear about it. But there you can talk about everything going on, and get the help you need.乌鸦传媒�

Watch for signs

Kate said if there is one piece of advice she could pass along to parents, it乌鸦传媒檚 to watch for certain telltale signs.

乌鸦传媒淔or me, it was recognizing when they start losing interest in things that they always loved to do. The sports stopped. My son was an incredible artist. He stopped drawing; he stopped all of that. And his friends changed totally too.

乌鸦传媒淲hen they stop seeing their old friends, good friends, and shadier friends start coming around乌鸦传媒� that乌鸦传媒檚 when I noticed the difference.乌鸦传媒�

Island Health offers many options and services for those seeking assistance with their dependency issues. Visit for more information.

terry.farrell@comoxvalleyrecord.com
Like us on and follow us on