As a somatic sex coach, Maxine Fischer of Body Beloved Coaching sees firsthand what dating culture is like and the common issues that plague those seeking sex and love.
Based in Victoria, Fischer, who has helped people embrace sex positivity throughout her adult life, has found that West Coast communities all tend to have sex-positive cultures.
乌鸦传媒淚 see a lot of people exploring alternative relationship styles and a huge acceptance of different ways of being. Many people come to the coast because they want a more authentic way of life,乌鸦传媒� she said.
乌鸦传媒淢y practice as a sex educator and coach has been busy. I would say that also speaks volumes to people乌鸦传媒檚 desire to create a more sex-positive experience for themselves.乌鸦传媒�
But while B.C. may offer a more sex-positive culture compared to some other places, it remains true that dating has never been deemed easy, no matter where you live.
A big challenge of dating in our modern times is the changes in expectations for romantic relationships, Fischer said.
乌鸦传媒淔or those seeking partnership, I see a desire to be met on a spectrum of levels 乌鸦传媒� emotionally, sexually, intellectually, spiritually. With the breakdown of village, we are seeking partners who will fulfil more and more of the roles that a whole community once served.乌鸦传媒�
Unfortunately, this comes in opposition to the short attention spans that online dating promotes, Fischer said.
乌鸦传媒淲e want deep compatibility but online culture can create a gap of disconnection that乌鸦传媒檚 hard to bridge. It乌鸦传媒檚 easy to get caught up on a person乌鸦传媒檚 stats and miss out on how they actually feel to be with and whether or not our values are compatible.乌鸦传媒�
Nearly half of single-and-looking adults turned to online dating in 2022, a survey by Pew Research Centre found. The most downloaded dating apps on Google Play are Tinder and Badoo, followed by Bumble, Plenty of Fish and Grindr. Other popular apps include Boo and Hinge.
Overall, respondents were divided on whether using dating apps was a positive or negative experience. Only half (53 per cent) said they have had a somewhat or very positive experience.
Fischer has heard first-hand from clients who have had negative experiences.
乌鸦传媒淚 work with a lot of men who get disheartened by online dating,乌鸦传媒� Fischer said. 乌鸦传媒淚 see it as a kind of marketing game when supporting someone to set up a profile. Many people don乌鸦传媒檛 have a sense of how to do that in a way that feels authentic.乌鸦传媒�
乌鸦传媒淥nline dating can be especially challenging for introverts and people who are slow to warm,乌鸦传媒� she added. 乌鸦传媒淔or those with low resilience, it can be a hard blow to self-esteem when they don乌鸦传媒檛 get their desired results. I think people are more impacted by poor dating etiquette and ghosting than we admit.乌鸦传媒�
While apps are unlikely to go away anytime soon, Fischer乌鸦传媒檚 advice to find love in Victoria is to get off of them and participate in community events that spark one乌鸦传媒檚 interest.
乌鸦传媒淚 think in the wild can still be one of the best ways to meet people,乌鸦传媒� she said.
Aside from deciding whether to be on or off the apps, another thing daters must navigate is deciding and communicating what type of relationship they want in an increasingly more open culture.
This applies to all age groups: the Pew Research Centre survey found that only half of adults 50 and older who have dated online in the past year cite meeting a long-term partner or spouse as a major reason.
On Tinder, around 52 per cent of Gen Z prefer monogamous relationships, according to a OnePoll survey conducted in 2023. On the other side, 41 percent are open to or seeking non-monogamous relationships 乌鸦传媒� with open relationships (36 per cent) and hierarchical polyamory (26 per cent) being the most popular types.
Fischer anecdotally has seen a growing interest in polyamoury as a relationship model in Victoria. While not suitable for everyone, polyamory offers an alternative approach to love and intimacy, attracting individuals curious about exploring non-traditional dynamics, Fischer said.
乌鸦传媒淎lthough it乌鸦传媒檚 still not the dominant culture you see a lot of people in Victoria who are either practicing it or curious about it,乌鸦传媒� Fischer said.
In essence, Victoria乌鸦传媒檚 dating culture embodies a dynamic where individuals navigate the complexities of modern romance while embracing the principles of authenticity, connection and inclusivity.
As Fischer aptly suggests, finding love in Victoria is not merely about swiping right 乌鸦传媒� it乌鸦传媒檚 about engaging with the community, embracing diversity and remaining open to the possibilities of human connection.
